Taking the plunge; baby & toddler groups.

Motherhood is amazing, the rewards outweigh the sleepless night, the sick stained clothes and the tantrums in the supermarket. But it can also be lonely. With a partner who works or even as a single mum, there is no adult interaction.. and you're often sat thinking what to do next. 
Baby and toddler groups can be a lifesaver for some (including myself!)
With a structured play routine and tea/coffee and cake on hand, groups are fab for mums and babies.

There are many different types of mum & baby groups. Some run by the Childrens Centres, some run by local churches and some run by organisations of many kinds.

They often include a craft/messy play activity, free-play time where your child can explore a variety of toys and games, snack time where a healthy snack and drink is offered.. and story/song time.
For parents a hot drink and biscuits may also be offered. 

The benefits to baby/toddler are obvious; social interaction, getting out of the house, learning to share ad develop skills needed in life, exploring different toys/activities that may not be available at home.

The benefits to the parents may not always be as obvious. Groups are often deceived as competitive, cliquey mummy meet ups, where children are left to run wild whilst the local mums have a gossip.


With a lot of groups this isn't the case.
There's a lot of benefits to mum. Firstly, just getting out of the house can do a world of good.. It is important to get fresh air/exercise after being cooped up inside with a little one. Secondly, seeing your baby/toddler playing with others can be a wonderful confidence boost- you have created thst tiny person who's now developing well and making friends. The chat with other mums is great, it will make you feel like you and not just mummy. It is also a good time to share experiences/worries/advice on parenting topics.
A cup of HOT tea.. well need I say more as to why this is a good thing? ;)

Taking the plunge can be scary at first, but once you're there its all forgotten often. 

I've made a lovely set of mums at our local church group, and it is now part of our weekly routine. Alyssa loves going and playing with her friends & I'm sure Emilie will too once she's older.

It's hard to make the first step, but just try to be yourself, don't fret- they are all mums too, if you're looking flustered, or the bags under your eyes are looking more like suitcases- they won't judge, hey are all in the same situation.

Enjoying the park after group.

That's all for now, Tamar xo

Enjoying the free things in life.

Engrossed in the piglets :)

Today Triston finally had a day off, so we took advantage of the nice weather and went out for the day.

Our first stop was the community farm. It's just across the fields by us so we took the pram, put on our wellies and ventured through the long grass.

The community farm is exactly that- run by the community. It is free to enter and is home to donkeys, pigs, sheep, cows, goats, chickens, bees, ferrets and lots of wildlife! 

Alyssa loved seeing the different animals and telling us all the animal noises!

We then walked down to the river and park. There's a nature trail through the woods which sits next to the river, and we spotted lots of fish, insects and giant dragonflies. We spent what felt like hours standing on the viewing platform looking at the bugs and insects surrounding the river. 

The park was our next stop and I took advantage of having no baby bump by sitting on the swings and playing with Alyssa! It felt so good to be able to do things with her again, whilst her baby sister slept in the pram beside us! (She was asleep for the whole trip- apparently farm animals bore her!)

Together we ate our picnic and watched the dog walkers go by.. it was so peaceful and calm, perfect after a hectic week of not having Triston home.

Sometimes in life, we pay for things.. extortionate things like days out to theme parks, cinema

s and soft play areas.. when in reality there are plenty of free things to do that are just as fun in the local community.

Overall it was a fantastic day, another day of memories made. Another day of positivity.

That's all for now, Tamar xox

My first month as a mummy of two.

Emilie is now 4 weeks old (exactly one month tomorrow!)
This time is flying by and I thought I'd reflect on my first month as a mummy of two.
It's been so much different to how I expected.
I honestly thought I wouldn't cope right from the word go.
I had images of me giving up and depression taking over.
I guess that's what happens when people are constantly knocking your confidence.
The moment I held her in my arms I felt a sudden urge of love, and then a sudden urge of 'I'm totally in control and I can do this'.
When we were allowed to take her home, nerves didn't rack my brain.. just excitement for the future with our two girls. 
The days passed and as I gained strength after a difficult after birth experience, my confidence shot up.
The first 2 weeks were difficult, I'll admit. I had a bad hemorrhage when Emilie was delivered and reconstruction after a bad tear so mobility was limited. I was getting my head round expressing breast milk, and I suffered retained placenta so was back and forth to the hospital.
These days we spent inside most of the time, with Triston doing the majority of outdoor trips with Alyssa. The housework was done but not exceptional.. but I didn't mind. I was too busy soaking in every last detail of my two babies.
When Triston returned back to work after 2.5 weeks, I had to pull myself together and get stronger so we could do things without him. 
It wasn't easy at first, things weren't perfect.. we ate freezer foods for dinner, the washing piled up quickly and we never got out the house before lunchtime.. but we were happy, and again, my confidence was rising and rising.
4 weeks on and we're doing great.. We're now settled into a routine where Emilie and Alyssa get equal amounts of attention and care. I'm slowly getting used to the chaotic, yet beautiful moments that fill our house with laughter. 
Since Emilie arrived Alyssa's behaviour has been great, which helps a lot! She is showing no signs of resentment and has not once hurt or showed jealousy towards Emilie. She's always helping and talking about her sister which I think is a big help!

Emilie herself is doing great, we've finally got her reflux 99% controlled, and on Friday we have an appt with her paediatrician to discuss the final stage of help they can give her to make it 100% under control. She's learnt to smile and is doing brilliantly with sleeping!

Of course, like I said, there are days where I get so overwhelmed by the bricks all over the floor, the baby sick in my hair and the sound of Cbeebies pounding in my head that I just shut the curtains, get us all back into our PJs and stick on a DVD to keep us all sane.. but I cherish these moments now, I'm no longer ashamed or trying to be the perfect parent.. I've realised that pleasing everyone else by having a tidy house, educational activities planned and a healthy homecooked dinner on the table is just too much sometimes, and totally not worth the stress. 
These moments will soon be in the past, and there's no point in stressing over things.. I'm just going with the flow and taking in every last minute of our crazy, crazy life! :)



Here's to a happy, healthy future.. with our two girls!

Stick around for my next blog, Tamar xox

What they don't tell you about being a mummy of two.

When I fell pregnant Emilie, I was told a few things about what to expect. 
My toddler will get jealous and resentful, I'll be exhausted all day, every day. I'll struggle to get anything done.. all I heard was the negatives.

Emilie is now 4 weeks old (tomorrow) and I've found all of this to be untrue! Our experience has been nothing like what we were told. It's been full of laughter, fun and happiness. 

The house has been fine, the toddlers been great.. and I've managed to eat and pee in peace too!

Now some of the other things they didn't tell me are quite amusing, and make this mummy of two malarkey a whole load of funny.

I've compiled a list just incase you want some light hearted humour about being a mum of two littlies.

1- You may find yourself being tag teamed. Stuck between a toddler that's fallen down the loo and a newborn happily cooing next to her own vomit. You will then have to prioritise who needs dealing with first.. the hysterical toddler or the teeny newborn!

2- Belly buttons may freak your toddler out! For the first week, every time Alyssa would see the cord and clamp, she would run and hide.. she thought it was a monster.. I guess we managed to change Emilies bum in peace whilst she was sat under the dining table!

3- Getting out the house before lunch may be a struggle at first, but it's okay because you'll burn plenty of calories chasing the toddler round the house trying to get her shoes on, and making trip after trip up the stairs to collect bits and bobs your baby frazzled brain had forgotten! 

So between the disturbed sleep and the long feeds, look back on the funny things and feel blessed to have such amazing little humans in your life!


That's all for today, Tamar xox

BLOGLOVIN.

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A little hello!

So, you may recognise my profile from my old blog(Life as a teenage parent!) 
I decided to create a new blog, 'My two girls and me'.. and here it is!
That life is gone now, the depression, anxiety, OCD.. The bad days are in the past & I've decided rather than blog on the page which has so many negative posts, to start afresh!

A little update from where I left off..

I stopped writing on my old blog when I was 28 weeks pregnant. I had a lot of stress going on and decided I needed a break, in this time I researched and spoke to other bloggers about professional blogging and decided to give it a shot once my 2nd daughter made her arrival and things had settled down.

Emilie-Olivia arrived on the 19th of July weighing 8lbs 2oz. She is perfect in every way and Alyssa is settling in to the role of big sister incredibly well. Depression has showed no signs of rearing it's ugly head and that's all I'm going to say on the matter.. This blog isn't going to be a 'woe is me' like my last, I've battled my demons and come out the other side & I'm hoping this positivity will keep mental illness at bay.

So what can you expect to see on here?

This blog will be a useful information page for parents, with product reviews, informative writing and even the odd 'What we've been up to' posts. Crafts/recipes/ideas of things to do with children & babies will also feature on here.

I may post updates on the girls, and share blogs that I enjoy reading, aswell as joining in on blogging link ups!

I think this is all for my first post, I hope to be posting again shortly, however my laptop is being borrowed at the moment so things may be slow for a short while.

Here's to a new chapter, and a new beginning with my beautiful little family.

Speak soon, Tamar xox